You are an awesome Colorado assuming i’m just an old lady was your first mistake shirt. I am so appreciative of the fact that you are getting your kid help. I didn’t have this from my parents and I wonder sometimes how things would have been different if I had gotten appropriate medical help. Keep it up!
Luckily for my parents I didn’t exhibit the same levels of anger and yelling and all that, but I did really struggle with understanding why and I had a hard time expressing how I was feeling because I just felt like I was getting punished by my parents on top of feeling internally like a total failure and it would sometimes manifest as anger because the world just didn’t make sense. Eventually I figured out that pretending to be dispassionate took less energy, so while on the outside it looked like things rolled of my back, internally it was a whole different ballgame.
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I, too, have a great conversational memory, but a terrible memory for Colorado assuming i’m just an old lady was your first mistake shirt, and used that to my advantage because the idea of facing that I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to was so overwhelming it felt like if I even allowed in a small amount of that reality, I would fall apart. Your kid may be a psychopath, but just as likely is your kid has built up extremely thick walls to prevent himself from having to deal with a reality that is unbearable.
I assume you have done this, but I didn’t see you mention it in an otherwise really detailed post so just in case.. have you talked with him about why he isn’t doing his homework? I would want to, but I didn’t have a dedicated place to study, I’d need to have my paper at just the right angle, the light and just the right brightness, no auditory distractions, if I made a mistake I was compelled to erase it so completely that my teacher couldn’t see evidence of the error, etc etc etc. When it all became too much and I couldn’t find a way to create that needed space, I just stopped trying because it wasn’t worth the mental anguish, and I had parents who were much more checked out that you and I was able to get away with it for a long time.