At this point I felt that her behavior supported my instinct that she was hiding something from Glorious Porpoise Loki shirt so I asked if there was anything else that happened that I should know about. She said no and asked if I was projecting and what was I hiding. I told her I am hiding nothing and I feel she is being dishonest. I told her I would not be upset and I just wanted to know why she was acting strange. (I trust her in the sense that I don’t think she would cheat on me but I could tell I wasn’t getting the while true that, thus I felt confident telling her I wouldn’t be upset.)
Red Flag 2: This is the point of no return. I asked, 2 or 3 times, if there was anything else I should know about. She denied again. I then said if that’s true then let’s look through her phone together. At this point it was like something snapped. The accusations about me not trusting her and tears started. I said maybe I am a huge asshole and wrong, but I have XYZ reasons to believe I am not getting the full story as outlined above. I requested for her to scroll through her pictures together, I don’t want control over her phone nor do I want to go through her communications. She adamantly said no. I told her she knows how this looks, if there is nothing to hide then what’s the concern. I offered her free range over my phone but she wasn’t interested.
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Red Flag 3: This is when the shifting series of excuses started. She said pics of the trip weren’t sorted yet so we shouldn’t look Glorious Porpoise Loki shirt yet. That made no sense. Then she said she might have a compromising picture of a female friend from the trip that she wouldn’t want me to see. So she requested a chance to look through first and then show me. This smacks of a blatant attempt to delete and hide something so I said no that defeats the purpose. Why would she have that kind of picture anyway?
My fuck up: At this point we were sitting in bed within inches of each other. She had pics opened and partially in my view. She quickly pulled the phone back and instinctively I reached out to stop her from pulling it away. I was wrong to do it and I crossed a line. But I want to be very clear that my hands made contact with her wrists for less than a second and I didn’t pull. I had laid my hands on her wrist and recoiled because I realized that I shouldn’t have done it. At this point she freaked out and left the room. I followed to the hallway and maintained a distance and apologized for my action.