I’ll accept your claim that details are “fuzzy” due to the length of time since the Halloween Funny Honkus Meowkus Cat shirt, because neither officer told you that Target Karen had committed “aggravated assault”. What Target Karen did when attacking you was simple felony assault (misdemeanor assault would be if she had simply threatened to hit you). However, the way she attacked you was most definitely NOT aggravated assault. Aggravated assault means the attacker tried to cause you bodily harm with “complete disregard to human life”.
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Another one to be careful of, especially since you have Halloween Funny Honkus Meowkus Cat shirt (as this one gets people who were trying to be “less” violent in serious trouble). Say you had decided to choke Target Karen out, in order to stop her from attacking you… Any physical contact that attempts to restrict airflow to the lungs or blood flow to the brain is AGGRAVATED assault in most U.S. states (it falls into that “disregard for human life” clause).