I’m going to talk to my therapist next week but… I’m seriously considering getting the Saddle up and read saddle up and read shirt done FOR ME. I deserve more than having my face relegated to the status of a weapon I use to fight back against those who’ve wronged me. My entire life doesn’t have to be a battle for every goddamn inch. I deserve closure, and I deserve peace. I need to rise above all of this or I’ll just be repeating this toxic cycle. A lot of you mentioned I should find my own surgeon. For whatever faults my folks have, the surgeon they chose is actually really good. I researched him and he’s legit and trustworthy. He’s worked on countless cleft-lip patients so he knows what he’s doing. And as for my parents… yeah I am through with them.
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I’m cutting them off. At this point, I pity them. I’m going to be the bigger person and let them have closure by seeing my Saddle up and read saddle up and read shirt after the scars, because like it or not, that’s what feels right to me. At some point before going full no contact, I’ll explain to them that I’m doing this because my granddad and uncle asked me to do it for myself. That’s it. They asked. Meanwhile, you guys (my parents) demanded and made it all about yourselves. THAT’S what changed my mind. Not to mention the fact that unlike the conversations I have with them regarding this matter (which usually leave me feeling ugly and like trash), I actually felt good about myself and empowered after talking to my gramps and uncle. Oh, and everyone on this sub who (constructively!) called me out and challenged my binary way of thinking. You’re all great and you made me grow as a person.