Its half eleven at night and I text my dad to see if he is awake. He is supposed to drive There Are No Bad Days When You Come Home To A French Bulldog shirt to hospital but I feel so bad to get him out of bed for what I still have an inkling is a false alarm. He says he will be round in 10 mins. My partner dresses me, he puts on my socks and my trousers, it’s starting to feel pretty hilarious now. It’s like are we actually going to have a baby?? When we come back to this flat will it be with another little one?? Our hospitals bags have been packed for weeks but there’s always last minute bits and pieces to get together. I make my way slowly downstairs, my mum and dad have both come for this trip. I sit on a towel in the car and breathe and moan through contractions.
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I think maybe I am a pussy and cannot handle the pain of false labour. I start to panic thinking that when it really comes to it I am going to fall apart. My mum holds my There Are No Bad Days When You Come Home To A French Bulldog shirt, I open the window so air is in my face. The ride take 15 mins but we cannot find the Labour ward entrance for nighttime. My partner runs around to find it. I am incapacitated although I still feel I’m putting it on somehwhat. Surely I can’t really be in this much pain?? He finds where we’re meant to go and he holds my hand as I hobble in. I tell my parents don’t get too excited, I will be back in an hour when they tell me to go home and I’m only 1cm dilated! We check in and I have to crouch on the floor to breathe.
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